Many people ask, "Why can't I find a good relationship?"  Perhaps it is because they haven't truly ended the last one.  We hold onto people in our hearts and minds long after they have gone.  We may hold unto anger, hurt and pain.  We may be holding ideas of revenge and destruction.  We hold onto romantic memories and special times using them as measuring sticks for anyone who comes along.  We hold onto our hearts, protecting them from pain, our minds filled with memories and doubts.  We believe our dreams are shattered and will never come true.  With all the stuff we hold on to, how can others get into our hearts?  We must learn how to close the door on old relationships.  We must sort through the rubbish, clear out the garbage and freshen up our hearts and minds to receive a new guest.

                                                                --  Iyanla Vanzant